Herbal Tea & Dead Debris

Well, today is Day Nine of the fast, and I’ve gotta say, it’s going really well. My desire for food has yet to return which has me a little concerned. Usually on a fast, I go in waves of craving food so deeply. Walking the neighborhood I peer longingly at patrons of various restaurants as they sumptuously bite into their meals. Grocery stores? Forget it, pure torture.

This time I’m getting mild flashes of hunger late at night, but no cravings. I’ve even been able to continue grocery shopping for Adam without batting an eyelash.

And I can’t help but wonder, “Will I ever be truly hungry again?”

Last night was the first night I felt worn out from the fast. I had done a lot of physical labor throughout the day and was a cranky goose by the end of it.

Today I did even more laborious tasks and I feel fine. It’s funny; they say that you’re supposed to keep things to a minimal while fasting, but I went in reverse this time. All of this physical and mental energy has just been pouring out of me.

I’m supposed to start ramping out on Friday if I want to be able to eat for Christmas. My body, my instinct, is telling me not to stop. I only have two more days left! Honestly, I feel like I could easily go until the end of the year. But I don’t want to push my luck. Better to bow out with a good 14-day fast, then push it and try for longer. And I don’t want to do that to Adam either. We’re already alone for Christmas this year. I don’t want him to have to eat alone, too.

Onto brighter things, literally, part of my aforementioned labor has been bringing light back to Bel Baines, the apartment complex that Adam and I manage. It began a couple of days ago when I replaced a burnt out bulb. That led to a lighting inventory and I was horrified to discover that a majority of the building’s lights were burnt out. (I ended up replacing 17 light fixtures in total.)

“In celebration of the winter solstice, I’m bringing light back to Bel Baines,” I jokingly thought. Although, throughout the process which ended up taking two days and two trips to the hardware store, I couldn’t help but to see that I was literally bringing light back into my living space.

I also washed the coverings of the light fixtures. Some of them had so much dead debris inside that barely any light shown through. (Metaphor me this, metaphor me that.)

Today I did a monster sweep of the exterior and hauled a nasty box spring that has been rotting alongside the front of the building for months now.

I’ve been trying to paint over graffiti for a couple weeks now, but the temperature is continuously too cold for the paint to dry.

Apartment managing. I don’t mind it, really. I like doing little projects around the place and there couldn’t be a better time for us to have a break in rent.

Plus, physical labor is a huge part of my writing equation. Cleaning, maintenance, any basic project that’s left-brained, task-oriented. It ramps me up. It gets me into problem solving, creative-inducing mode. Shooting video with Front Row worked really well in this context for both Adam and I. Something about the easiness of it, the repetition, it filled the left-brain and sparked the right.

And it worked again today. Tonight, working on the show, I was able to smoothly identify my next steps and literally, in a flash, I had a major break through: something to incorporate into the formatting that I hadn’t seen before.

I guess I’ll bookend this little nugget with a return to the fast.

One thing I have confirmed in the past nine days is that I don’t like herbal teas. I try. I know they’re better for me than their caffeinated counter-parts. But they’re gross. One of them tastes like body odor smells, leaving me with the after-taste of vomit.

Miss food? Nah.

Miss coffee?

Christmas morning, baby, I’ve got a date with my love, my muddy black, pupil-widening delicatessen.