(No) Pontification if You Please

Something I’m very wary of with my blogging, is to avoid pontification.

My goal is to share my observations, my experiences and my beliefs with friends and strangers alike. I have a tendency to get overly energetic when it comes to the realm of communication and I’m leery of coming off as though I’m preaching from atop a soapbox.

I am, by no means, trying to claim that what I share is “truth” or “right” or better than anyone else’s thoughts, beliefs, or opinions, etc.

Rather, I’m simply exercising a little word play.

As an adolescent and a teen, I was known amongst my friends as the storyteller, the exaggerator. I was always taking little chapters from my everyday life and injecting them with hues of fiction, eager to portray a colorful, entertaining story. I loved making people laugh and was naive and gullible enough to generate plenty of original material.

From my mid to late teens, I was a loud mouth. I was that annoying person who had no understanding or comprehension of keeping my voice at a tolerable level. At restaurants, movies, whatever, my friends were always telling me to “bring it down a little”.

Acting was, from a very young age, the artistic platform of my desire. I did a few plays in high school, but nothing major. I went to film school and moved to LA with hopes of working the production side of the industry, networking, and then using my contacts to start auditioning.

I was too scared to ever really go for it. I guess the impending fear of rejection was too much for me to face at the time. In addition, living in LA, I quickly realized that I was in no way, shape or form, fitting into the model that casting directors were looking for.

I like manipulating my body too much: tattoos, piercings, body modifications, hair colors, I’d be an agent’s worst nightmare.

My English teachers throughout high school urged me to follow communications. I knew then that I loved words, composition, storytelling, but I thought I wanted to be in the spotlight.

As I’ve aged, I’ve lost my desire to be the center of attention. I’m much happier on the sidelines, observing, absorbing, processing.

I recently defined myself as an aspiring extrovert who got comfortable in the role of writer-introvert.

I also examine the relationships between pontification and our first two feature screenplays.

The baby, “Modern Wreckage” is a mind bendy piece wherein the lines between fiction and reality blur as the main character uses self-inflicted violence as a coping mechanism.

I am brought back to a pitch meeting we had with the film division of the biggest (industry) player in town.

I won’t share the name of the gentleman we met with, but let’s just say he was a friend of a friend and that’s the only reason we got the meeting.

He was sure to remind us of this no less than three times throughout our hour-long stand off.

He didn’t like us. He didn’t like our screenplay and he didn’t think we could write.

In hindsight, damn it was an early draft that we took to him; too early. However, the part that bothered me the most from that meeting was the fact that he didn’t believe it was a fictional piece. He was convinced that our lead character was really Adam. Adam’s life story.

Granted, writers pull from their life experiences. But then we explore, we research, we integrate. We create a world that did not exist beforehand.

“Let me guess. If I were to ask you to roll up your sleeves, I’d see a bunch of scars from you cutting yourself,” he fired.

Nope. Not a one. Asshole.

But, hey thanks for your vote of confidence.

And, by the way, all the movies you’ve produced are shitty. You wanna talk about talking heads dialogue and flat characters…………

I digress.

All in all, it was a good learning experience and, looking back, I’m certain the friend of ours knew she was throwing us into the lion’s den.

And I thought there would be less rejection with writing then there was with acting.

Ha. Ha. Ha.

Our second feature examines evolution and how, ultimately, peace overcomes violence.

He didn’t like that one either.

So as a screenwriter, as a blogger, as a painter, as a photographer, as a friend, lover, wife, daughter, sister, (you get the point) I’m constantly working on conveying my messages in a manner that is pleasing, comprehensive, and entertaining to the recipient.

It excites me to know that this will be an ongoing journey throughout my life as a communicative vessel.